You’re floating on cloud nine. Your heart races every time your new boo texts you.

You can’t stop staring at their Instagram pics. You daydream about your next date during work meetings.

That giddy, loved-up feeling is what’s known as new relationship energy (NRE). It’s totally normal to be infatuated at the start of a new romance.

But NRE doesn’t last forever.

Here’s what you need to know about this intoxicating relationship phase, and how to keep from crashing too hard when it inevitably fades.

What is New Relationship Energy?

New relationship energy is that butterflies-in-your-stomach feeling you get during the honeymoon phase of a new romance.

You’re obsessed with each other. You want to spend every waking minute together. You crave their touch and affection like a drug.

Psychologists believe NRE is driven by biological chemicals and hormones like dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline and serotonin.

These chemicals produce feel-good emotions like excitement, passion, and euphoria when you’re with your new squeeze. You get a natural high from their presence.

NRE isn’t just limited to romantic relationships. You can experience it with a new friend or co-worker too.

Anytime you make a meaningful new connection with someone, you’re likely to feel this intoxicating buzz.

Signs You’re Riding an NRE High

Wondering if you’re currently trippin’ on new relationship energy? Here are some common signs:

1. You can’t stop texting each other cute messages 24/7.

2. You feel electrically “buzzed” whenever you’re together.

3. You can’t keep your hands off each other. The sex is hot and frequent.

4. You forget to eat or sleep properly because you’re so distracted thinking about them.

5. Your heart races, and you feel dizzy when you see them.

6. You obsess over their social media and pics.

7. You cancel plans with friends to hang with your new bae instead.

8. You imagine your future together and can’t wait to experience more life “firsts.”

9. You put them on a pedestal and overlook their flaws.

If this sounds like you, congrats! You’re head over heels. Just know the intensity won’t last forever.

Why Does New Relationship Energy Fade?

It seems unfair. You finally meet someone who gives you the feels, and then those feels start to fade. But there are a few key reasons NRE mellows out eventually:

1. Your brain gets used to them

Remember, NRE is driven largely by dopamine.

Dopamine is released when something is new and exciting. Over time, your brain gets less stimulated by this person’s presence. The high diminishes.

2. The infatuation phase ends

In the beginning, everything about them seems perfect. But as the rose-colored glasses come off, you start to see their human flaws. They can’t maintain the charade forever either.

3. You settle into a routine

You learn what to expect from each other. The unpredictability and mystery wears off, which can lower the adrenaline rush.

You run out of new experiences together. First kiss, first sleepover, first road trip, etc. You’ve already experienced all the “firsts”, and there’s less novelty left.

4. Oxytocin and vasopressin kick in

These hormones create feelings of attachment. So while the passionate NRE fades, a deeper companionship bond forms in its place.

The good news is less intensity doesn’t have to mean less love. You’re just transitioning to a calmer, more stable phase of your relationship.

How Long Does New Relationship Energy Last?

There’s no definitive shelf life for NRE. It depends on the relationship. Some couples might feel it for a few months. For others it can last over a year.

Generally speaking though, new relationship energy tends to fade after about 3-6 months, once the dazzling infatuation period ends.

Here are some factors that influence how long that initial high lasts:

Your attachment styles: Anxiously attached people become infatuated quickly, while avoidants take longer to warm up emotionally.

How often you see each other: If it’s a long distance relationship, NRE might last longer since you don’t get sick of each other as fast. Out of sight, out of mind!

How emotionally intimate you are: Deep, personal conversations fuel greater NRE. Superficial relationships lose steam faster.

Chemistry and compatibility: Some couples simply vibe better together than others, elongating the honeymoon period.

How long you’ve known them: If you were friends first, strong NRE might happen later down the line after more foundational bonds develop.

While every relationship is different, most experts agree the crazy-in-love feelings mellow out around the half-year mark.

Signs Your New Relationship Energy is Fading

Uh oh. Those fired-up feelings are fizzling. How do you know when the NRE magic is starting to wear off? Here are some clues:

1. You don’t text nonstop every single day anymore. Gaps between messages get longer.

2. You’re not having hot sex multiple times a week. Your desire starts to stabilize.

3. You notice their annoying habits more, like how they chew loudly or leave towels on the floor.

4. You care less about putting on a facade to impress them. They see you in your natural state more.

5. You make plans with friends without worrying what bae will think. You don’t feel the need to constantly see them.

6. They seem more “human” now and less like a perfect angel on a pedestal.

7. You have fewer emotionally deep conversations. Your texts get more logistical focused on everyday plans.

8. You think about your own needs and interests again, not just theirs. The obsession lifts.

These changes are totally normal as the relationship matures. But it can feel disappointing if you expect the dizzy infatuation to last. Better to anticipate NRE fading than be surprised.

Dealing with the “Crash” When NRE Ends

That peak intensity can never be sustained forever. Just like an adrenaline junkie needs a bigger high over time, we adapt to that early relationship rush.

It’s common to grieve the loss of NRE once it’s gone. Some describe feeling depressed, anxious or insecure when things cool off. It can trigger worries like:

• “Are they losing interest in me?”
• “Did they meet someone else?”
• “Are we out of the honeymoon phase already?”
• “Why don’t they text me cute things or initiate sex as much?”

Try not to catastrophize these changes. Your relationship is simply entering a new chapter, just like NRE inevitably expires. Here are some tips to ease the transition:

1. Recognize it’s a normal process

The dazzling, butterflies-in-stomach period has an expiration date for all couples. Remind yourself there’s still an opportunity for deeper intimacy and companionship ahead.

2. Don’t take each other for granted

It’s easy to get lazy and make less effort once NRE wears off. But keep investing in thoughtful gestures, fun date nights, great sex, and emotional availability.

3. Cultivate external interests again

Reconnect with friends, hobbies and goals you neglected during the all-consuming infatuation period. Bring new energy into the relationship by leading vibrant, independent lives too.

4. Try new shared experiences

Novelty stimulates feel-good neurochemicals. Explore and learn together to reboot those giddy NRE feelings from time to time in your long-term relationship.

5. Focus on quality time

With the frantic excitement fading, be proactive about scheduling meaningful connection. Deepen intimacy through activities like taking a trip, cooking together, discussing books, etc.

6. Check-in on how you both feel

Have open conversations about your emotions and expectations as the relationship changes. Getting on the same page prevents misunderstandings.

7. Seek help if you’re struggling

If one partner feels WAY more grief and anxiety about lost NRE, it may indicate attachment wounds or deeper problems. Consider couples counseling.

Just remember change is inevitable. By bracing for the NRE comedown and staying intentionally engaged, your bond can still flourish through exciting and calm phases alike.

Making Relationships Last Past the NRE Phase

While new relationship energy offers an exhilarating high, most people want more from love than a short-lived neurochemical rush. Follow these tips to develop a deeper connection built to withstand the test of time:

1. Build true compatibility

Don’t prolong rocky relationships just for nostalgia’s sake. Make sure you share the same vision for your future, ethical values, communication styles, sexual needs, etc. Core compatibility matters most.

2. Invest in intimacy

Stay curious about each other. Share secrets, dreams and vulnerabilities. Deepen trust and affection through physical and emotional intimacy. Keep dating and having romantic moments.

3. Establish a strong friendship

Successful lifelong relationships require genuine friendship too. Enjoy each other’s company. Laugh together. Be able to hang out comfortably sans romance or sex.

4. Allow space for independence

While togetherness is great, aim for interdependence over codependence. Don’t forego other support systems. Maintain your own interests and friend groups.

5. Manage conflict constructively

All couples argue sometimes. Discuss issues calmly when they arise instead of letting resentment build. Learn each other’s conflict styles and triggers. Seek help from a counselor if needed.

6. Accommodate each other’s changes

People evolve over decades. Adapt to changes in needs and priorities with age. Check-in frequently about what works in the relationship and what doesn’t.

7. Keep seeking growth

Challenge each other to be the best versions of yourselves, while also being understanding of flaws. Maintain intimacy through continual learning and shared adventures.

The most enduring relationships bring out each person’s highest potential. They’re nurtured proactively and weather all of life’s inevitable storms.

Enjoy the giddy infatuation period while it lasts!

New relationship energy is a thrilling and intoxicating phase of romance. Just know the crazy intensity can’t be sustained forever.

When NRE inevitably fades, don’t panic. Focus on building deeper intimacy, compatibility and friendship in its place.

With understanding and effort, almost any relationship can transition smoothly from dizzying new love to steady, committed companionship.

The key is managing expectations, communicating openly, and staying invested in each other’s growth. By weathering different seasons together, you just might build a love that stands the test of time!